Was wondering if I'm quite cold cos was thinking bout my late grandma's funeral, then I realise that I didn't cry at her funeral or even when I found out that she's already passed away... I only cried when I found out that she was in her last stage of the cancer. Didn't even feel any sadness when I found out when my dad was involved in an accident when I was Sec 1... Even went to my basketball training on that day as if as nothing had happened.When my mum was admitted to hospital last year, I was not that worried and didn't went to visit her at the hospital as much as I should. Even if I were to go to the hospital, most of the time I would sit at the lift lobby cos going into the ward kinda make me sick in my stomach...
So, yeah, am I that freaking cold?
I know that I can be mean at times, but that's maybe because of all these principles dat I have. Like I want to try to trust people, but I can't. Maybe, that's because both of my parents keep promising stuffs that they never did deliver...And also because maybe I've never have any close friends... Since young, my classmates always treat me as a freak cos I don't behave like the fucking bitches that they were. So, yeah, they thought that I was weird. Maybe, I am weird. I like stuffs that most people don't like... So what?! I love to be different from others instead of being clones of other people, just like most of the people in my class... Luckily, the people that I usually hang out with, are not like that. Phew....
At times, I don't even know what I'm thinking about, don't know why I did certain things....
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